It’s been a little while since my last blog – and it’s good to take time out, even of things we really enjoy isn’t it? Life in general gets so busy and moves at such a pace that we often simply keep on ploughing through and before we know it, we are running out of steam, worn out – mentally, emotionally and physically – and just desperate for rest, sleep and more rest and yet we never know when we are going to find the time to do that.
Interestingly something I have learned over the years is that we very rarely find the time. For something important to us or our well-being, we have the make the time. It actually tells us how much we value ourselves whether we make the time or not….
Darker mornings, sun low in the sky, twisting grey clouds and that sense of the summer having left and winter just being around the corner – we are in that moment, aren’t we, of Autumn coming upon us.
I’ve always loved Autumn – the sharpness of a fresh morning, the leaves crunching underfoot, my dog chasing around like a mad thing after leaves flying and swirling in the breeze, candles giving illumination to evening twilight. Oooh, I get tingles just thinking about all the cosy loveliness that Autumn brings!
The colours of Autumn are so vibrant and earthy – reds, golds, russets. They are also very healing and Autumn itself is, for many of us, a profoundly healing period. I admire the qualities and resonance of Nature enormously – she makes no mistakes and there is a reason as the leaves fall from the trees that we begin an inward journey of reflection.
As some of you reading this will know, my lovely Grandma passed to Spirit last week. She was 95, and was really well until the last few years.
Gran was a cornerstone of my life; she helped bring me up when I was younger as my mother worked away and she was, until the last few years, the one unchanging and constant aspect of my life.
Through changing times, growing pains, moving on and upwards through life and experience, my Gran’s constancy was like a lighthouse shining brightly to guide my ship through the turbulent seas of life. She never changed, never wavered and my understanding of her unchangeable nature was a security blanket through any changes I might have been going through.
Both my mum and I were with her when she passed. We were called as her breathing changed and spent several hours with her. I wasn’t sure she was actually ready to pass – she had been on an end of life care plan for only a few days and there is never a finite timing with such things – and then all of a sudden I felt my Grandad step in and I knew.
Recently I’ve kept being given the phrase Moving into Being by spirit – and you might have seen it mentioned as part of my Facebook or Instagram posts over the last few weeks.
I’m undertaking a fabulous course at the moment with an amazing group of people which is encouraging a deep dive into the self, and into the soul and this phrase, Moving into Being, has made perfect sense with this work.
I want to tell you a story…
There was a girl born into a decent middle class family. Her parents split just before she was born and so her mother became a one parent family with the support of her parents who helped bring the little girl up during her early years as her mother often worked away where she earned good money to support her daughter.
The little girl often found it difficult to express herself articulately as she was emotional and sensitive and this wasn’t as understood then as it is now.
She was good at school but with no real passion for any subject except perhaps English literature – she loved stories.
Love is the universal coin, the energy that makes the world go round. Everything we are here for is about love.
Realising it, and also recognising the absence of it when that occurs, which it does to all of us at some point, in some way. In that moment, the memory of love, the hope of love is often what sustains us – be it intimate, parental, friendship, self.
Some people may disagree and believe that it is money that makes the world go round (that old adage!) but actually, even there, it is the love of money isn’t it, and the fear of not having it?
Love is the magic that moves mountains; the power that transforms; the water that nourishes growth and the honey that is the nectar of life…if we can allow it to be what it is and to work its’ beautiful magic freely and without the constraints of wants, needs or demands.
Love’s magic demands courage and it demands freedom.
I was sitting here on this lovely Saturday evening working on my next book when I was suddenly inspired to change tack and write this post for my site.
It is 20 May and tomorrow it will be one month until my birthday and it has taken me until one month and a day before my 46th birthday to be truly happy with who I am and with where I am. This realisation came to me earlier – that I am totally and truly happy and at ease with me.
It wasn’t a wow moment. It was a simple moment of realisation from deep within and then overwhelming gratitude for that.